your weekly guide to the stars, sun and (full) moon

November 22, 2021

Holy shit, you just lived through some of the most intense astrological energies of 2021 - so if you’re feeling wiped, you’re NOT alone. As the Sun and Mercury move into the adventurous sign of Sagittarius, you may find yourself with a sudden urge to take risks, travel to far-off lands, or simply consider a wider poo-spective on life. Follow your internal rumbling and trust that good shit is coming.

Aries

It’s the perfect time to dive horns-first into shit that inspires you, Aries, whether it’s a new relationship or a good book. Just don’t get stuck reading on the toilet so long your legs go numb.

Taurus

If you’ve been thinking about launching a new venture, your funding might just come through this week. And don’t let anyone shit on your business concept - bidets for cats could be a million dollar idea!

Gemini

Big things could float to the surface in your relationship this week. Consider this shituation an opportunity for growth, even if it’s just farting in front of each other for the first time.

Cancer

You’re on a roll at work, and this week might present another chance to let your compassionate poo-sonality shine. Your coworkers already know you’re the shit, but a little reminder never hurts.

Leo

There’s big energy around your love life this week, Leo. If you can stop gazing at yourself in the bathroom mirror long enough to sniff out this new romantic shituation, you might be blown away.

Virgo

This week is the poo-fect time to get even more organized at home. Alphabetizing your Poo~Pourri collection? Making sure every TP roll in the house is hanging over, not under? We’re here for it.

Libra

Smell that, Libra? An exciting travel op-poo-tunity is on the horizon. Maybe you’ll finally get to witness the reverse toilet flush of the Southern Hemisphere you’ve heard so much about.

Scorpio

You’re feeling flush with cash this week, and that shiny object you’ve been eyeing is just dying to come home with you. ‘Tis the season to shop for others, but hey - doo what you gotta doo.

Sagittarius

Your go-with-the-flow, poop-with-the-door-open, free-spirited nature is thrust into the spotlight this week, Sag. With the Sun and Mercury moving into your sign, you’re basically unstoppable.

Capricorn

It’s a great time to doo your civic doody with some volunteering or charity work, Cap. Consider this the poo-fect way to keep your inner workaholic satisfied even while you’re on Thanksgiving break.

Aquarius

It’s go time for your goals this week, Aquarius. Whether that means finally enrolling in that class you’ve been eyeing, applying for a new job, or learning to fart a tune is entirely up to you.

Pisces

Your career is headed for big expansion right now, Pisces. Maybe you’ll finally get a key to the executive bathroom so you can drop the kids off at the pool in style.